A small gesture is often so meaningful. These small gestures give you enough reason to smile everyday. A colleague tells me my hair is looking good… I smile. A friend brings me a cup of tea… I smile. A coworker calls me up when I am unwell… I smile. You get the general idea!
However, it is these small gestures that I often forget. I would be there when a friend needs a shoulder. I would be available if a colleague is in trouble. But what about the small gestures? They just don’t occur to me.
Conjectures on Gestures
I’m not a bad person, I guess. I do good stuff, you know. I feed stray dogs. I lend money without expecting it back (heck, mostly I don’t remember whom I’ve lent money to). I am ever willing to listen to people going through a bad day and ever ready to help someone in need. Then why is it that I miss the small gestures? I don’t call my cousin when he’s unwell. I forget to ask a colleague how her son performed in his math exam. I don’t ask a friend how her first day in office was.
I guess I expect people who know me to know that I will always be there for them. The only thing they need to do is ask. And when it’s something big, I guess my friends do feel free to ask me. However, I rarely remember the small gestures.
The Seas of Small Gestures
Here are the four C’s that I believe make up the world of small gestures:
- Complimenting: “I love your dress” or “Your new haircut looks fabulous” or “I really like your watch.”
- Caring: “You don’t look well. Can I get you a glass of water?” or “Hey, do you need help carrying that bag?”
- Compassion: “I hope your interview went well” or “The weather’s terrible. I hope you were warm through your journey”
- Comforting: “Don’t worry, I’m sure your son will feel better soon”
While I know this, the fact is that they don’t strike me at the right time. Maybe small gestures need a kind of conscious sensitivity. Anyone knows how I can work on that?
The 4 Cs concept is quite interesting. I would actually like to add one more C to it. How about ‘Communicating’? I remember attending a theatre workshop in Mumbai, in which we practised some of such gestures. One can actually express how open he/she is about talking over something through small gestures.
Ya, it is important to communicate the compassion and care that you feel for yourr friends and loved ones. Even if i love my friends and care a lot about them, i have failed at several occasions to communicate that love ….and i was shocked to find that some of them found me extremely low on love and compassion. Thanks Priya for the post. It will help several people to become aware of teh power of small gestures.
Such a warm, touching post! Loved every word of it!