Better looks, more friends, fitter body, higher salary, costlier gadgets, and greater power. Some people can get envious if they do not have any of these, but their acquaintances do.
It is strange that they hardly care about these possessions till they make a comparison unconsciously, and find themselves deficient. This comparison exposes their low self esteem and insecurity dissolves them into bitterness.
Weed out Envy to Nourish Relationships
While completing thoughts on completeness, I realized that envy is one of the by-products of feeling incomplete. When one does not possess something that somebody around him or her does, he/she may get restless. This fixation gets translated into a changed behavior towards the person who is being envied – a danger to even the strongest of relationships.
When It’s Good to Envy
There is nothing wrong about wanting to be like someone. It can prove really positive for you to idolize personalities for:
• what they have achieved or aspire to achieve
• their qualities, such as fortitude and articulateness.
This can do wonders as long as this desire to be like somebody is absorbed as inspiration. When envy reaches the stage in which people feel impotent and stop striving towards what they desire, it is time they shake themselves up.
Why Being Envious Makes No Sense
Do you really want to be a green-eyed monster? Making attempts to hinder a person’s march towards his/her goals is taking you away from yourself and distracts you from your goals. Emitting negative energy will bring negativity back to us. It is never worthwhile to neglect yourself and concentrate on what is happening in somebody else’s life. Moreover, if somebody’s success does not make you happy, you will probably not be happy even when you succeed.
If it is fame, looks or money for which you are destroying your peace of mind, think again. None of these stays forever. What does, for you, is the life you fill in moments of connecting to yourself and pursuing what you desire. Invest energy into knowing yourself. This would also make you aware of your strengths and make you realize that there are so many things that make you unique.
I feel envious that you write so well
I dont quite agree with this part though.
You write – “If it is fame, looks or money for which you are destroying your peace of mind, think again. None of these stays forever.”
Yes, these things dont stay forever… but that is not the reason to not pursue them. If these things make us happy, we should pursue them…. provided:
1. We enjoy the journey of pursuit.
2. We do not compare our success at achieving them with what someone else has achieved.
I guess we tend to focus too much on the result, rather than the journey. And it’s the journey that counts so much more.
Agreed that the journey of pursuit has to be enjoyed, but we must also be conscious of what we are heading towards. Is it true happiness that we are pursuing?
of course, the result is very important… because that is what defines the direction of the journey. All I was saying is that “achieving” the result should not become so important that we forget to enjoy the journey.
LK said… do karam, not phal ki chinta.
This is a relevant post, considering how people are generally so intent on pursuing what other people do or trying to get ahead others.
Personally, I think I feel envious when I spot brilliant writing and listen to heart melting music. Otherwise, envy has no place in my life.